Monday, June 29, 2020

Aspiring Serial Killer Recommends Wearing a Mask - "I can't kill you if you are already dead"



       Covid has most of the world on edge and Shawn, like many of us, are stressing over the situation with only one big exception.  Shawn is worried about Covid killing you and not him.  No, he's not worried about you dying.  He actually WANTS you to die but he wants to be the one to kill you.  Shawn is an aspiring serial killer from Toronto.  He has taken to social media to vent his frustration with the pandemic and how the Corona virus took killing right out of his hands.
  
     "I've always wanted to kill" Shawn told Horrorable News.  "I've never liked people and as I was growing up I always had to hide my blood lust from my family and friends.  I was going to make 2020 my year and begin my reign over Toronto in March but Corona closed everything down.  With everyone hiding in their home I was unable to prey on the people of the city.  Now, everyone is ignoring the mandatory masks and succumbing to it.  HOW IN THE FUCK CAN I TORTURE AND KILL YOU IF YOU DIE TO THE FUCKING CORONAVIRUS!"

     Horrorable News understands Shawn's frustrations.  Too many entitled fuck knuckles are running around snotting and breathing on people instead of wearing masks.  These same people that refuse to wear a mask don't know what a clit is and was still trying to pick up high school girls well into their 20s because women their age needed a real man.  

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