Slipknot is a nu-metal band that came to fame in 1999 with the release of their self-titled album Slipknot in case you didn't know their name. The band would go on to become one of the biggest metal acts of the 2000s along with bands Korn, Limp Bizkit, and Marilyn Manson. Like the other bands, Slipknot has faded in popularity but still have a strong fan base. Yesterday the band announced a new line of whiskey in hopes of winning back some of the fans they've lost. "It was a business move we have discussed for years and decided it was time to finally do it" said the Slipknot dude that is also in the band Stone Sour that is loved by soccer moms and guys that also listen to Aaron Lewis' solo albums. "We noticed our crowds are getting smaller and smaller so we thought it would make sense to get them good and drunk with our own brand of whiskey. They would tell friends and those friends would tell their friends. Before long people will want to see us live again because who doesn't want free shots and metal?"
Tammy Wiseau of Michigan is one of the few remaining Slipknot fans that is excited for this news. "I was in college when I first heard Slipknot live. It was such a fun show. I don't remember a lot about it because I kept doing shots at the bar but I remember having a lot of fun. I don't drink too much anymore. I don't want to be that person anymore especially after having two children that now depend on me but that doesn't mean that when they get older I can't open the bottle and reminisce about how fun it was to be drunk at a Slipknot show."
Instagram model graveflower666 is also a goth mom and fan of Slipknot. "I love Slipknot but since I had Edward and became a mother I can't really drink anymore while I'm breastfeeding. And before you even ask, Yes I did name him after Edward from The Twilight Saga."
The new whiskey, No. 9, will feature whiskey made from the finest corn Iowa has to offer that will be a "smooth drink for the maggots out there wanting to party in the pit."
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